“This guy i met trough internet, and now we are having s long distance relationship. But nothing goes right… sometimes he is good to me sometimes he is not…he says he wants to be with me and he only wants me…but we keep fighting around little and stupid stuff…he keeps coming back and apologizing and i keep taking him back… ever time we talk on the phone he says that he is crazy about my voice and that he cant help his self and he masturbates everytime he hears me talking…i dont know what to do, how to handle this situation? sometimes i think he loves me but sometimes i feel like he is just using me?”

- She (21)

Social networks have become sort of like an electronic bar or online club (like shaddi.com) in a way, as people all over the world are using these sites to meet and get to know new people daily. Add to that the fact that it is so easy and you will see why these sites have become the place to be.

A few simple steps are all it takes to join. First create a profile account in at least three social networking sites to increase your chances of meeting great dates. Link up to your friends networks to gain access to all of their friends.

Then it is time to get to work! Browse through those networks and look for cute women you might be interested in. Use the search tool to define and specify exactly what kind of woman you are interested in dating. The advance search modes in some of the sites allow you to narrow your choices by age, sex, location and ethnicity as well. For example if you are interested in East Indian dating just type this in. desi singles and others who are looking to be matched with someone from a specific background should definitely make use of this option.

An advantage to meeting someone on a social network site is that you have a screening process in place. Ask your friends if those women are worth dating to avoid any psychos or drama queens. Once you have narrowed down your list, make use of the information on the profile to ensure that she is really single and learn more about her hobbies and personality.

When you are ready, contact her directly by sending her a message, posting on her wall, or invite her to play an online game that is hosted by the website to let her know you want to get to know her. By posting comments back and forth on each others profiles you can get to know each other better. This definitely increases the comfort level with a new person without wondering what you should talk about, since you can plan what you want to say ahead of time. Before long you can begin to instant message one another and start “talking” online. Doing these things will literally help you bypass all that time you would have spent figuring out how to awkwardly approach her.

If it seems like you have things in common, take the next step and try to meet her in person. Ask her for her phone number or find out clubs, bars, or restaurants she visits regularly. Schedule a date or ‘run into her’ by chance. If you have some mutual contacts in common online, she will be more comfortable meting someone she has never met before.

If you are not ready to go that route you can simply find out where many single women meet by reading the information posted in the sites. There are always announcements about a local party or ‘the place to be at this weekend’. Once you know where to go, just show up. Check out the crowd and see who you would want to approach. Shy guys should look over some dating advice sites, like googling Indian Dating tips before showing up. You make sure you make the most of the event and do not end up being a wallflower because you chickened out. Take some comfort in knowing that most of the people there are looking for someone special just as you are doing.

One thing to keep in mind when adding new-found friends is to make sure they are ‘real people’ as there are many fakers who use social networking sites to collect email addresses and send spam. Do not give out too much personal information to someone you do not really know much about, no matter how hot the picture on the profile is. In the event you contact someone who you think falls under one of these categories is very easy to block them, report them and remove them from your list forever.

Social networks have come together to open up a world of dating possibilities never imagined before. These are wonderful tools to help you meet beautiful, intelligent, professional women in your area. Chances are that the woman you have been waiting and searching for is waiting for you too. The possibility is there. Take advantage of it and act today!

Contributed by Ashok and expert on Indian Dating Tips, and author of www.indiandatingtoday.com

Finding a compatible partner to date is never easy. If you are looking for singles in the USA then the dating pool of compatible partners is even smaller. Use information that is available on the Internet to help you get ahead on the dating scene. If you do not have a specific woman that you are interested in, online dating sites are a great way to meet many women. By meeting different women at the same time this will help you find the person that’s the best fit for you. Of course the quality of the person is what is most important. If you want to find someone that is smart, beautiful, and funny it will take some effort online to learn where the right woman for you is. Before you sign up for a site, take the time to do some research. Perform a Google search to see how users rate or review different matchmaking sites. Join several online dating sites at the same time. You would not expect to meet the perfect woman for you by going to the same bar every Saturday, so cast a wider net and increase your chances of meeting someone perfect for you by seeing who’s online. Signing up for at least three sites will help you accomplish this.

Most dating sites allow a free membership for some length of time. This is a great opportunity to at least check out what the available women in your area are like. It can be surprising to see the number of people who live near you and spend time in the same places you do, but have not crossed paths with you. Even if you have no interest in actually dating online, you can also get information about where single women like to hang out during the weekend or see what they do for fun. Do search for available women in your zip code and surrounding areas. Make sure you are actually attracted to the pictures that you see online. If you are not, then there is no point wasting your time. Forget about that site and put your time towards other ones. If there are actually profiles of women catch your attention, then go ahead and make contact online. A bonus of online dating is that you actually have information about a potential date right in front of you, and they are letting you know up front what is most important to them. Remember, the number of people who join online dating changes everyday, so the statistics are in your favor if you stay online for at least three months.

Google is the easiest way to gain information about a specific woman that you want to date. Entering in her name or workplace can give you information about her interests such as, civic, volunteer, or political activities, professional organizations, or athletic clubs. Of course you should also go ahead and perform a Google search on yourself and see what your online reputation is like, since you know she will be doing the same thing once you ask her out on a date.

Social Networking WebsitesCheck out your friends’ networks on Facebook, Friendster, Twitter, or MySpace and see if they have any female friends you would want to get to know better. This is the easiest way to see if she is someone worth getting to know. Your friend can give you all of the insider information and possibly give you the most valuable tool in dating this woman, which is an introduction.

Dating Advice Websites If you have found women online or in person that you want to get to know better, then take advantage of websites that offer dating advice like shaddi.com.

Looking for a partner online is nerve wracking for everyone. It is hard to put yourself in a vulnerable position and actually say that you are alone and ready to meet a companion. Remember, there are many others just like you who are looking for someone special to share their time with. If you have not met a potential partner yet, hang in there. The more you date and put yourself out there, the more likely you are going to meet someone perfect for you.

When our story ended, the emails had become hot and heavy, so did the instant messages and later phone calls. The distance of the west coast versus east coast enabled us not only to test each other’s limits but also our resolve. I wondered if this meeting would ever take place, but yet there was no stopping the outcome, good or bad, it was inevitable. So the next phase begins of this internet fantasy, where will it lead us? I was sure of one thing, I was drawn to their words, each one with a lifestyle and an adventurous spirit uniquely their own. The fates pulled 3 people together from beyond the normal boundaries and restrictions of everyday life. We were enthralled, intrigued, and stimulated, yet we were willing to explore this opportunity to find the answer to the question…”Fate or Fantasy?”

Lady #1, Valencia, a 30 something free spirit with intriguing words and a sensuous phone voice. Valencia and I shared many late nights chatting via computer, often times till 3am, the bond was so strong that we spoke or communicated via computer on a daily basis.. She was an admitted polyamourous woman, which meant she dated or had relationships with various partners and did not desire a monogamous relationship. I did not fully understand her lifestyle and we spent many conversations with her informing me of the intricacies of the polyamourous choice. Even though I had captured a different side of her, I just truly did not know the boundaries of my heart or my mind in this matter?

Our conversations after about 4 months began to wane as everyday life and distance took its toll on both of us. It was like having a craving for something and one day waking up, realizing that the desire is no longer there! I attempted many times to contact her with no response, and I suppose that I may have over-romanticized our relationship? Finally one late night we caught each other online and connected for what would be the final communication. Valencia informed me that she did not desire to be romanced or courted and though the elements of flirtation and attraction were there. In no uncertain words, she spelled everything out so clearly that even a blind man would have understood the message!

Lady # 2, Treasure, a beautiful, charming, sexy blond from Sin City, she did make the trip to the east coast for us to meet. A mature woman with a heart of gold, she had the desire to find out if our connection was real or imagined? We met within 3-4 weeks of chatting and I made arrangements for us to stay at a local hotel. She arrived first and settled in while I was finishing up my work day. When she met me at the door, she was as breathtaking as her picture, she came up put her arms around my neck and we shared a gentle kiss. We went out for dinner and our conversation flowed with ease, with elements of flirtation mixed in making for a memorable night. Our days and nights at the hotel were a mix of talking, flirting and as consenting adults making a connection, it was heaven! In the end it was a certainty that her life was on the west coast and mine would remain on the east coast. We are in contact and she was one of the influences behind me deciding to present my writing for publication, she is my number 1 fan!

I’m sure that for all of us life will go on as usual, whatever we shared is now diminished by time and distance. So to answer the question, “Fate or Fantasy?”… It is a little of both, Valencia was a fantasy, but she opened my eyes to new possibilities; Treasure was fate that only time will continue to tell the story between us! We came into each other’s life for a reason and though we may not see it clearly now, one day it will become evident…”Hello Ms. Heartbreak, I’ve been expecting you!”

you can reach me at HelloMsHeartbreak@yahoo.com with questions, comments, thoughts…or drop a line to just say hello!

The most wonderful experiences in life cannot be planned or foretold, you must be open to the hands of fate. Our future as they say maybe written in the stars but it is only the beginning pages, it is left for us to write the story of how we reach our fate, the when? The how? the where? They are so many possibilities, you might find that special someone in a bar, the supermarket, the internet, or in the pages of a personal ad, etc…We spend our time weaving our dreams of more and never being able to put it into words, let alone finding a woman, who can be our dream come true? I wish to find that balance of love and passion, of fate versus fantasy , often times what we seek becomes more than our dreams can envision.

You are a dream at this point, or like a mirage in the desert, real as a distance vision, unreal as I get closer to you. Sometimes even the simplest words cannot express the emotion we wish to see and hear in someone’s voice , actions , or in their written words. I have faith and confidence in the stars and I know that one day we will meet and all answers will be clear, often times the greatest words are left unspoken.

So as I began my correspondence with a lady who lives on the West coast versus me who lives on the East coast, something called and connected us from across the miles. But with the distance and the routine of our daily lives, we chose to accept the limitations placed upon us by distance.

This Lady is blonde, 5’8, BBW (Translation: Big, Beautiful, Woman), with confidence, independence, a fierce passion for life and adventure. She is the elusive femme I seek down to the very core and whether this connection is real or imagined ? I must wait until we can meet for the question to be answered. She has whispered words that haunt me; the way she describes herself captivates, intrigues, and invades my thoughts on a daily basis. I am fully aware of the reality that someone closer may capture her before I have the chance to reach the West coast ?

She has captured my interest like no other has in a long time; we have exchanged photos, and feel that something is forming. All this happening over a personal ad on a website is strange, I admit, but it is an investment of time and even real time emotion. I dream of seeing her smile, feeling her sweet kisses, and holding her close in my arms.

The desire to want more passion, your fantasies to come true in one person, does it exist? I willingly walk into this with my eyes wide open and take the risks that we may never meet. All will be revealed in time, our secrets and desires will be uncovered as we continue upon this path called life. Our time together can be filled with electrifying passion, even primal in nature at times, but yet gentle and loving as at the moment my heart is tied to you, until the fates decide their course.

Will this internet connection prove to be “Fate or Fantasy?” Will she become just another memory, where upon I must then write the words “Hello Ms Heartbreak, I’ve been expecting you?”