We all love a good laugh. Recent research tells us there are all sorts of great hormonal and biochemical benefits to laughter. It lowers your blood pressure and heart rate and promotes health and overall well-being. In other words, laughter is good for your health. So what does this have to do with offering relationship advice for this week? You now know that laughter is good for your physical health, but did you know that laughter and a sense of humor is key for keeping your relationship together as well?

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“Hello and welcome to We Already Have your Money and There’s Nothing You Can Do About It. For customer service, press 1 or say customer service…” I enunciate, “Customer service”… “I’m sorry, I didn’t understand, did you say new reservation?” “CUSTOMER SERVICE,” I bark into the phone. “Customer service,” she repeats cheerily. “Please enter or say your 18-thousand-digit account number now.” Oh, man, where is my card? This time I decide to punch in the numbers.

“Did you enter 8…7…5…4…4…3…3…2…3…2…3…2…9…9…9…9…9…9? If this is correct, please press 1 now; if it’s not correct please press 2.” Braaaar, I practically smash in the one key.  “For information regarding your account, press or say 2….” “TWO!” I bellow. “For a new or existing problem press or say 4… for passengers with questions regarding intercontinental, European or Mid-Atlantic travel press or say 5…

I wonder, Did they hang up on me…again? I don’t dare hang up, even though I am furious that I have to be on this stupid call; they should have a card that racks up extra miles for all the hours you spend trying to redeem your points you have worked your ass off for. I push the phone into my head to see if I can hear anything and then…”Your business is important to us, thank you for holding.” Then nothing again. I have literally over half an hour invested so there’s no way I am hanging up now. Did I mention this was my third call?

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If you and your partner are careful with your finances and you don’t have kids yet, you better relax and enjoy yourselves while you can.  I know my wife and I went down the path of turning things down or not purchasing things we wanted, claiming we didn’t have money.  Five years later and two daughters we wish we had a fraction of the cash we did back then.  The only time we get out to dinner is when a family member can watch our kids for free and I find a decent place on restaurant.com to get a twenty five dollar certificate for four dollars.

Experts will tell you that money is the root of most couples’s problems.  Since I’m not an expert, I didn’t say that.  Bills pile up when you get married, and when you have kids, the bills octopuple, or however you say that, eight times more.  If you have friends inviting you to a Caribbean all-inclusive trip and you already told them you can’t afford it, call them back up and tell them you’re going.  You can find decent deals, including airfare, which will be cheaper than the hospital bills for delivering a baby.  Once you have a baby you ain’t going anywhere for a long time anyway.  Ha ha ha ha! Sorry, I can laugh because I’ve already been through the sleepless nights and currently in the lack of communication phase, which I’ve realized is very similar to talking to my spouse, “I don’t understand you, what the hell do you want?!”  Just kidding honey, I love you!  For the record, I don’t say “hell” in that quote to my child, I say “F__K” instead.

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If you are 30, or older, you might think this is hilarious!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning…. Uphill… Barefoot… BOTH ways… yadda, yadda, yadda

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on my kids about how hard I had it and how easy they’ve got it!

But now that I’m over the ripe old age of thirty, I can’t help but look around and notice the youth of today.  You’ve got it so easy!  I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!
And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don’t know how good you’ve got it!

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Private jokes. Code words. Shorthand ways of communicating. It’s part of what makes a couple a couple. To hubby Dale and me, for instance, “not pregnant” means “don’t make assumptions.” Here’s how that one came about . . .

We were on the way to an afternoon matinee. I was driving my hot Mustang, chatting and not paying attention when Wham! I rear-ended a van. We pulled into a parking lot. I went to the driver’s side. Dale ran to the other side. He yanked the door open, then said to the large female passenger, “Oh, my God, you’re really pregnant!” She wasn’t.

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Warning and Disclosure: Gals, do not fall for any of these! If you did LoveDetour.com is not liable for any damages made to your body and your feelings.
Guys, LoveDetour.com does not guarantee the results of these pick-up lines. You are at your own risk for using them! Certain side-effects may occur, such as rejections, slap in the face, being called names like “What a loser!”, kicked in the balls, and being arm-barred by the MMA boyfriend. Please consult your nearest friend and your head before pursuing.

LoveDetour.com did not create these pick-up lines, nor its officers, staffs, and experts! It was Bubba & Cooter!

LoveDetour.com does not know if Bubba & Cooter actually look like that in the picture. The photo was attached in the forwarded email.

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We all love a good laugh. Recent research tells us there are all sorts of great hormonal and biochemical benefits to laughter. It lowers your blood pressure and heart rate and promotes health and overall well-being. In other words, laughter is good for your health. So what does this have to do with offering relationship advice for this week? You now know that laughter is good for your physical health, but did you know that laughter and a sense of humor is key for keeping your relationship together as well?

… read more

We’ve all had them. Everything was going so well and then . . . . We ran out of gas, as happened to a high school classmate of mine when he finally got a date with his crush (homecoming night or prom night, don’t remember which). The cat runs out the door while we’re saying good night, or his cat gets between us when we’re sitting on the couch ready to kiss. (Both happened to me.) The car battery dies, we get pulled over for speeding, our credit card gets declined after a very nice, expensive dinner, we find out we forgot to close our fly, a pre-date waxing goes completely wrong.

Here are some more horror stories shared by my brave and generous friends.

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Whilst in the midst of a late night web surfing session the other night, I stumbled across a great relationship-related-humor article at www.keithgoodrum.com.  Although I hope you will all view this with a sense of humor and get a good chuckle out of it, nonetheless, subtle truths are contained within.

INSTALLING A HUSBAND

Dear Tech support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 … read more