“okay nd my bf now ex well he had been cheating on me and it was the whole relationship but he told me wen he goes to parties he gets drunk and ends up doing something stupid and well he cheated on me and brokeup with me cause he realized wat he did the next morning and the day after he wanted me back and i dont know whether i should give him a second chance or not and its been stressing me out cause i love him and i wanna be able to give me and him another shot.”

- Gabbie (17, Opelousas, Louisiana)

“hi – i just broke up with my fiance of 15 years in july2011- we have a son of 11- he went to work uk in nov 2010 and in july 2011 came home and broke up wth me-he said i dont think   i really ever loved u and cant see my self ever marring u – i still find u very attractive- and maybe we can always have our little thing together!– so he has come home a few times to see his son and due to him staying in family home- i am silll liven in famiy home due to financial circustances– we have been together- i guess only sexually to him–i guess im still in love with him and am findin it hard to move on— but why would he try to be with me– i think i know the answers to these questions– ie he wants his cake and eats it– hes selfish- he just needs sex -the july prior to him leaving  i did something bad to hurt him as he hadnt been treating me very well– he was a builder all his life and earned good money and due to recession took work bouncin in local niteclub- when he finished at 2am he sat and drank at bar till 6am or even later 8am 10am- of coure at first i thought he was messin around but did go a few times to pick him up and generally he was just having the crack chatting ad excessively drinking- he admitted he was lonely and was out searching for that miss right– i could write and wrte – prop need to get counselling as ireally feel fucked up about this- lonely – the thought of been a lonely parent- i miss him- i know he wsnt good for me—- but why does he do that- come on to me and we end up in bed?–

why is he using me- why did i not see this years ago- why did i let it go on for years- why am i so afraid – six months have passed- tryin to be positive

- Orla (38, Ireland)

“I’ve been in a long distance relationship with a guy while on vacation in Turkey for about 1.5 years. At first, I was totally against it and he wasn’t even my type and I rejected him but as I got to know him, I saw that he was a good person, career oriented, and really seemed to like me. He comes to visit me in the States and I visited him a couple times in Istanbul. The problem is, I am due to move to Turkey to live to be closer to him, as his job is more lucrative and I can easily relocate and work. However, I am having doubts about the relationship. He comes from a traditional family and he is keen to marry and have lots of kids. I’m not even sure if that is what I want right now. We don’t have a a ton of stuff in common and I feel like I”m just settling for him because I think I’m 27 and should be getting married soon. I broke up with him once before but we got back together after we talked about it. Whenever I express any doubts he always says he will do whatever he can to make me happy, and I know he is not lying, but I just have a feeling there may be someone better for me but I am afraid to break up with him and be alone. I don’t know if it’s the distance creating these problems (when I’m with him, things go well) or if I’m not just in love with him. any advice?”

- Krisna (27, US)

“i broke up with my bf a year ago. He is in love with other girl too. So i left him. He is my first love.. After him i couldn’t accept anyone. Now he is contacting me with no reason. This keeps me smiling n happy. I know he is still with her, this makes me feel guilty. I don’t know what to do?”

- Madhu (19, TN)

“My fiance and I seem to have a bit of communication problem, when he does something that I dislike and talk to him about it. He makes me feel like im overeacting. But thats not the issue, on thanksgiving me and him went to a friend house and out of nowhere he was like “hey take me home very rude like in front of everyone, when the girls ask him why? He was oh u girls are having fun and im not so needs to take me home( no descretion) so feeling ambarass and disapointed I broke up with him.. So since then ive tried to call & txt him.. He has ignore every attempt I made to talk about so two weeks later he sent me a message on facebook saying whats up, I didnt respond because I didnt respond to him whitin 20 minutes he delete me of facebook.. I feel like thats childish.. All the while I attempt to try to work things out..on his only attempt he behave that way. That also make me feel like he never really truly care about us or the lifetime commitment that we talk about…what should I do if do decide to come back?”

- Sheila (28, West Palm Beach, FL)

“Yesterday my ex and I had a long conversation abt crossing boundaries and I had been nothing but good to him but through it all I feel I still love him even though he constantly did me wrong I need help sorting through this. Help me?”

- Nesha (23, Spartanburg, SC)

“I want to love him.
I dated this guy for 11 months, things on my end just started going sour in between, certain things he did just started to annoy me. Whenever I’d try to talk to him about things he’d focus on one bad thing I said and wouldn’t look at the big picture. I no longer wanted to have sex with him, sometimes I didn’t want to be around him. Eventually we broke up, I wasnt ready but he kind of forced it out of me, I couldnt honestly tell him I still wanted to be with him. I can still see a future with him its just that he’s so immature at times I can’t stand it. He also acts like he has no common sense. He’s always blaming me for his sexual frustration, we’re trying to be friends, but he’ll get mad at me and say that he doesn’t want to be friends anymore and he wont talk to me anymore and I have to talk him out of it. He acts like I have no feelings at all, I wish he was the one. He can be very sweet and would never cheat on me or abuse me, but its just his mentality that bugs me. I have all hopes out that hell be the one in the end, he just needs to grow up. Am I foolishly thinking?”

- Rawr (18, SC)

“My boyfriend and I have been together almost 4 years. We recently hit a, very rough spot. I allowed my best friend to stay with us for 5 months. My boyfriend and her became close ( not that close). My boyfriend then started breaking up with me every fight we had, this happened for the final time about 30 days ago; my best friend left and I made plans to move, home ( in turn quitting my job and dropping out of school).

I love my boyfriend and best friend. If I give my boyfriend another chance my best friend will hate me and if I don’t I could miss out on something special.”

- Kristin (22, Iowa, US)

“Well i dated this guy for 4 and a half years. things went smoothly for the 4 years but he started going out alot with his friends and this girl. he eventually broke up with me 6 months later so that he could be with her. it was hard but i let him go because she is what he wanted. but although he was dating her, he still kept calling and texting me to check how i am. recently he told me that they have been having some problems and that she controls him too much. it was not my place to tell him what to do with his relationship.

about 3 weeks ago, he called me telling me that they broke up and we can finally be together. i didn’t believe him. last week he knew i was going out and met me at the place i told him i was going and told me that he loves me, he always has and always will. i told him i love him back because that is the truth.
we were talking all day everyday since then. but 2 days ago, he stopped and i have no idea why.

in the mean time, while i was trying to figure what happened to make him stop talking me, another guy that works close to me told me that he really likes me but he has a girlfriend. he comes to see me during my breaks, tells me he wishes i was his girlfriend and things like that.

im so confused. i dont know what to do or think. “

- Tiya (21, South Africa)
please help

“So I met this guy last july and he lives a couple towns over. We have talked on the phone and in person a lot. We both fell in love. Then I find out he has a gf still even though he said they broke up. I was upset he lied and broke my trust but he said he only did it because he didn’t want to lose me and that he was being selfish. He doesn’t want to be with her and hasn’t since we started getting serious. But he feels he can’t break up with her yet because her father JUST died. He doesn’t want to crush her anymore but I feel so bad that he’s with her. I love him and he loves me but should I wait for him or what? Idk what to do.”

- confused (16)