1. Carefully look at your wardrobe and figure out what you need to change. What you wear says a lot about you. Which is why you should get rid of the clothes with holes in them, and outfits that are old and outdated. You should also take into consideration your choice of footwear. Most women prefer shoes or leather boots on a man over sneakers.

** To get a better sense of style, purchase a recent GQ (or even Playboy) magazine and look at the fashion sections. The clothes that the male models wear are always in style and rated high according to many women. If money’s an issue, go to a non-expensive clothing store and ask a woman who works in the store for her opinion on the best types of outfits to choose. Because after all who would know more about what a woman want- than an actual woman.

2. Shave…and pay attention to your smell. Ditch the “5’oclock shadow” and overbearing cologne. Personal hygiene is one of the most critical parts in attracting a mate. You want to look like you care about your image and how you smell. If a woman can smell you from a mile away…it’s not a good thing.

** A woman smell is much greater than that of a man. So if you choose to put on cologne, only spray a little bit on. Inside tip: The best thing to do is use unscented deodorants and soaps because us guys carry a natural pheromone which alone may potentially attract a woman.

So you see just making small changes in your style and image, can have a huge affect on how a woman judges you at first glance. So start attracting women today!

Witness the example of my dad, who recited Lewis Carroll’s “Jabberwocky” (you know, “’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves . . .”) from memory in order to get my mom’s attention. Technically, it wasn’t a pick-up line, as a mutual friend had introduced my parents and they had been talking at length before my mom excused herself to leave for class. Dad merely wanted to make sure Mom remembered him. Dad’s penchant for nonsense verse worked; my parents were engaged three months later and will celebrate 35 years of marriage on May 4.

Alas, not all men are as original or classy as my father. An acquaintance of mine who wishes to remain anonymous was talking to a hot single dad at a party. He’d taken out his BlackBerry to show her pictures of his adorable kids, and she fussed over how cute they were. Then he “accidentally” scrolled to a picture of his – ahem – male organ. (No, she did not say it was “cute.”)

My friend Katy shared two equally crude examples she heard when she was in her 20′s. Now in her 40′s, she says, “Do we dare to hope that perhaps men in my age group have outgrown these annoying lines? Or maybe I just don’t hear them because I don’t go to bars any more.”

Alcohol does seem to lower inhibitions, as proven by these gems:

• “I’m standing at the bar talking to someone I think is a perfectly nice person when he says, ‘I have to go to the men’s room. Would you like to come and hold it for me?” Ew.
• This one is from an anonymous friend of Katy’s: “She spent the evening talking and drinking with this guy and she thought he was so nice. At closing time, he asked if he could walk her to her car and proceeded to ask her if she wanted to have sex.” Bad enough, but wait for it . . . “When she said no, he responded with ‘OK, how about a blow job then?’”

This last one Katy shared is actually rather cute. “A guy made a ring out of a dollar bill and said, ‘You look like the woman I’ve been waiting for all of my life. Will you accept this ring?’ I only remember that I got very drunk and ended up spending that dollar later in the evening (and I felt guilty for doing it). I always remember it, and I remember thinking it was corny but sweet,” she said.

Another corny but cute one, courtesy of Jen: “Was in Tennessee in-between classes my freshman year of college.  This guy that I had gone to school with since first grade comes up to me as I was sleeping in the hallway with my alarm set.  He gently kicks me, and I of course woke up to him standing over me. He kneels down smiling and goes ‘Are you from Tennessee?’  I went, ‘Of course, why would you ask that? I’ve known you for 10 years.’ (longer now, of course.)  He goes, ‘Because you’re the only Ten I See . . .’ I rolled my eyes and was going to try to finish my nap and he goes, ‘Want to go to the movies with me?’ DOH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had walked right into it, and for our friendship I went to the movies with him and made sure he knew it was only as friends.  Don’t have a clue what happened to him because shortly after that he dropped the couple of classes we had together.” [Incidentally, Jen is now happily married (not to the old school friend) and a mom.]

Another sweet one comes from Valerie: “You are beautiful inside and out.” Awww. Valerie didn’t say whether she went out with the guy or not, but many women I know (OK, me included) would at least give him a second look.

My friend Becky, in her 50′s and one of the savviest daters I know, offered this cautionary tale about lying. While not about a “pick-up line” per se, this story is a great reminder about honesty, whether meeting online or in person. “I talked to a guy on an online dating site. According to his profile, Michael was 5’10”. He wrote me poetry and sent me songs – that really interested me. I always meet for coffee on the first date. I was early and knew what he looked like.  I saw a man who resembled Michael come in and I thought, ‘That can’t be him.’ He came over and sat down, and I was shocked as he was about 5’4”. He started telling me how good I looked in person, and finally I said, ‘I thought you said you were 5’10”.’ He looked me straight in the face and said that he was just diagnosed with osteoporosis and that it was very severe and he had already lost six inches. I could not stop laughing, and I almost spit out my coffee.”

Becky continued, “I told him I too had osteoporosis and had only lost ¼ inch. He finally admitted he had lied about his height in order to meet me. I told him he didn’t have to do that, and he apologized. We ended up becoming good friends.”

What lessons should single people looking for a date or a partner take away from these stories? Sweetness and originality pay off; crudeness doesn’t. While dishonesty may seem like the best policy, it only works if you admit that you fibbed, and perhaps not even then. Honesty and authenticity work best; would you really want someone who doesn’t like you for who you are? Oh yes, and watch your alcohol consumption. Alcohol severs the connection between the brain and the mouth.

About the Author – Meghan K. Donovan is a creative spirit moonlighting as an office manager and freelance writer. She lives in Cleveland, Ohio with her two almost-human cats. She believes in God and in the power of chocolate to heal most ills. She digs guys as committed to peace, social justice, and spirituality as she is.

She won’t.

And after a few rejections… a guy begins to think that women have a problem.  So he waits until he feels a “connection” before “going in”.  That means that men are alone a lot and women are a lone a lot!  Nobody is happy, but you’d think if you both wanted to get together it would be easy.

With the right knowledge it CAN be easy.  (read about it at… www.tips-for-flirting-with-women.com : pick up artist advice from an ultra secret community)

The single MOST important piece of the puzzle is something called a…

Time Constraint

What is this?  Well, it is just what it sounds like…

Basically you say, “I gotta go but…”

What does this do?  How does this help?  And you might be wondering why you have never heard of this before.

Let’s go with the last one first… why you have never heard of it.

Because 99% of the information out there about picking up women is coming from people who simply are NOT good at it.  They do NOT understand it and are merely giving their best shot at explaining.  It is NOT scientific in any way.  Just ordinary people talking about what they think is important.

Would you trust that same person to explain to you how to build a space shuttle?  Not if you were going up in it!  But your relationship with women is even MORE important!

Understand that when a woman is approached by a man, under ANY circumstances, he is lowering his value in her eyes.  But, you ask, how do you ever get a girl?  None of us want to rely on luck… (used to do that and it ain’t good!)

You have to approach… but if you understand that you are lowering your value… that’s the first step.  The second step is damage control and raising your value as quickly as possible.  Not only do you have to raise your value (in her eyes) back to it’s starting position… you actually have to go much higher!

You see, as you walk up and begin to talk, her mind engages the conversation… but her mind doesn’t decide if she is attracted to you… her body (instincts) do.  And as you walked up her body lowered your value… which raised her tension level.  In response she wonders when you’re going to go away.  Not her mind… her body!  Her mind might be answering your questions or blowing you off… doesn’t matter.

When you tell her in the first few lines… “I just have a sec, my friends are waiting for me…” it answers this unasked question of hers… and her tension level lowers.

Without her knowing and without most guys knowing… you have just demonstrated… “Control over her World” one of the most powerful steps to building attraction.

It’s hard to believe that this one little sentence could be such a big factor.  I’m sure in your mind you’re already downplaying how important it is.  Don’t!  It’s been tested.  Approaches fail about 44% more when no Time Constraint is used!  That means…

For every ten girls you would have had… now you get five.  For some guys that means for the two girls you could have slept with this year… now you only get one!  Now that sucks!

Just a simple sentence stuffed in at the beginning to control the tension level of a woman.  Too much tension and a woman must flee but not enough tension and you have nothing to turn into attraction.

The Time Constraint is the vital key to the puzzle.  Use it often!

When we left off, you saw the best way to approach a woman, and break the ice for a conversation. I feel the hardest part of trying to approach and talk to women is the initial approach. Being able to go up to her, make her feel comfortable right away, while not triggering her defense mechanisms that I have talked about before, is the hardest part. When I say the hardest part, I mean the scariest and most nerve racking. It’s like anything in life. Step one is always the hardest step to take.

So, what do you do now? What are you supposed to say? You want to say the perfect thing. You don’t want to seem nervous. You don’t want to seem silly or dumb. AHHHHH!!!! Your head feels like it’s going to spin right off your body!

Well, don’t worry because I am going to give you a few quick tips on what you should say and how you should act once you start talking to her.

1. Ask her an opinion question/gender specific question. Asking a good question normally leads to good conversation, unless you are dealing with a complete dud. I find that women love giving their opinion on any topic, especially one that involves getting a female perspective.

I’ve also realized that women love talking about sex. Guys, believe me, they are more comfortable talking about this than you realize. Try and keep up on current events that involve women and sex. These are great topics to talk about. Scandal is never a boring topic either.

You can say something like the following.

“Hey, I have a quick question for you. My friend and I were having a conversation and we would like a female point of view. Did you know that a recent poll indicated that 98% of men think they are the ones with the upper hand in a relationship? What do you think about that?”

Now, that stat isn’t even true, but it is exaggerated enough where it can really get someone worked up quickly. Most women will jump all over a statement like that, and the conversation will take off from there.

2. Remain a bit mysterious. Men try too hard to sell themselves to women right off the bat. This is a major turn-off to women, and I talked about this a bit in Part 1 of this series. There is no need to tell her every detail about yourself in the first 10 minutes. She doesn’t want to know about all your great connections and all the cool things you have with all that money that you have earned.

Instead, keep the conversation playful and light. Joke around. Continue the gender related conversations. You need to move one step at a time. Leave something to her imagination. Make her want more. This will benefit you greatly.

3. Don’t push things. If you are talking to her, and things aren’t going well in your opinion, then don’t push it. Chalk it up, and move on to the next one. If you feel like doing it, try and get her phone number. It can’t hurt at this point.

If you are sensing that things are going really well, just take it to the next level. If you are talking for a bit, end the conversation. Tell her it was nice meeting her, but you need to get back to your friends. As you’re getting up, tell her you would like to have another debate sometime on gender differences, or whatever you were talking about with her, and get her phone number.

Don’t say, “Can I have your phone number, please?” Instead, say, “What’s your phone number?” It’s far more powerful, and you are not giving her the ability to say no. She can say, I don’t want to give it to you, but she can’t simply say no.

Also, by ending the conversation, you seem independent, and not too clingy. Women respond to this type of behavior. Most men sit there and talk to her all night, trying to get into her pants the whole time. By ending the conversation a bit sooner than most, you will have her wondering and thinking about you, and that is what you want.

Lastly, remember that you just want to move forward one step. Men tend to jump forward a few steps because they’re always looking to close the deal that night. Although that works at times, I don’t suggest it as a long-term game plan.

For more information, pick up a copy of the “Dating Savant Playbook.”

As I said in a recent article “Getting Past Women’s Defensive Walls – The First Steps To Attracting More Women” Women put up walls as a time management tool. If they spent time on every dude that hit on them, they wouldn’t be able to leave their own homes. Because of this, it is important to have a few tricks up your sleeve that can open her up, and let you into her world. This is not always easy, and quite frankly, you will face some rejection, but it you implement these techniques, you will be light years ahead of most men.

When a guy spots an attractive lady, he tends to make some serious mistakes right off the bat. First of all, he waits way too long before he approaches her. For this story, I am going to call our guy Dan. Dan tells his friends to check out the hot blonde by the bar, and immediately 4 drunk dudes are ogling her. If he’s unlucky, she will see all 5 of them staring at her like dorks.

Dan then ponders when he should approach her, and what he should say. This is very bad. Not only are you taking too much time to talk to her, which will only make your head spin trying to think of the perfect thing to say, but you are also leaving the door open for someone else to talk to her. To make matters worse, the longer you take, the more she will see you and your friends drooling over her like dogs. If this happens, say adios to the pretty blonde.

So, what can you do to actually approach and talk to a girl and have her enjoy it and not run for the hills?

1. Approach her immediately. Don’t give yourself time to think about things, and don’t allow enough time for her to see you staring at her 25 different times. I think you should approach a woman within 5 seconds of spotting her, but absolutely no more then 10 seconds. And, if the first time you see her, she happens to be looking at you too, she will think you are extremely confident when you walk up to her so quickly. This will be a turn-on to her, which will also immediately get you one step closer to getting past her wall.

2. Approach with strong body language. Women are far more perceptive than men, and they read body language very well. Way, way better than us guys! If you walk to her with your head down looking like you just got beat up by a little boy, then you have canceled out step 1.

Walk to her with purpose. Keep your head up, looking right at her with a small smile. This smile can almost be a sly grin. If she is looking at you, do not break eye contact. If anyone is going to look away first you better make sure it is her. Stand tall with your shoulders rolled back and your chest out. Walk at a medium pace, not too fast but not too slow. A nice, cool stroll will tell her that you are in control.

3. Don’t get too close to her. When you finally get to her, don’t get too close and invade her space. This will make her really uncomfortable. A couple feet is great.

4. Don’t seek approval or use pick-up lines. If you try and seek her approval, she will think you are insecure. No woman wants an insecure man. Don’t use pick-up lines either. I can’t believe that guys are still using these dumb things. They don’t work!

5. Greet her uniquely. Going up to her, shaking her hand, introducing yourself, and asking her what her name is, is totally boring, and clumps you right in with all the other dudes that have tried to talk to her. Make yourself stand out. Be unique. You want her to experience some emotion when she meets you. This is an attractive quality. It might feel weird or awkward at first, but in the long run, and as you become more comfortable with yourself and your technique, it will pay off.

There are various things you can do. one thing you can do is go in for a “high five.” Use your left hand too. As you are giving this unique greeting, say “What’s up?” or “What’s happening?” Draw it out too. Say “Whaaaaaat’s happenin?” or “Whaaaaaat’s up?” You can add a nickname to this as well. Whatever that is. Say your unique greeting and add a piece of clothing she is wearing, or the purse she is carrying. Not only is this unique and fun, it is showing women that you are noticing details, and women appreciate this. They don’t try and look nice for nothing.

So, you can say something like “Whaaaat’s up Louis Vuitton?” or “Whaaaat’s up great shoes?”

It might sound silly to you, but it’s a far more effective opening than what women normally hear.

Please stay tuned for part 2 of GREAT TIPS FOR APPROACHING WOMEN.

For more information on attracting more women, please visit the following website.