A question asked by many. The ideal of soul mates goes back to the days of Greek mythology and Zeus, who split all of the humans in half leaving them to search for their other half to complete each other. Theoretically, humans during this time had four legs, four arms, and two heads. Although researching Greek mythology, I have never seen pictures or drawings of humans with this configuration and many Greek statues have no arms. Generally speaking, there is a misconception about the meaning or the ideal of a soul mate. I find that most people think of a soul mate as their ideal partner, love, or the perfect one for them. The term soul mate is defined by many people very differently. One soul mate may have a different purpose in our life than another but typically it is a feeling of deep and natural affinity, intimacy, love, sexuality and/or compatibility. You may feel all of these or any combination toward someone.

You may have a soul mate with whom you are not intimate or sexual with and are merely platonic friends. In my book, The Straight Man’s Pocket Guide To Picking Up a Hottie-Written by a Woman Who Loves Women, I talk about a few of the women I have encountered. Some of these women are soul mates and although I do not have romantic relationships with them now, some of them are still in my life as very close friends. Some of these women are not my soul mates and I have friends who are clearly soul mates and some who are not. There is nothing set in stone.

The purpose of soul mates. Have you ever met someone and instantly felt as if you’ve met them before or there was something so familiar about them? Or felt such a strong instant, extremely deep connection with someone or like you’ve known them your whole life? It is possible that this person is one of your soul mates and is here to help you fulfill a purpose together. Sometimes their purpose is life long and sometimes only for a short time. If your purpose together is to raise children then they will be in your life obviously much longer than someone who is here to assist you learning a life lesson. Some of the most difficult lessons in life are patience, unconditional love, forgiveness, and tolerance. Humans cannot learn these life lessons without other humans to interact with and be presented with challenges. The harder the lesson, the more you will be challenged. That is why intimate relationships are so difficult sometimes.

Soul mates come in many forms. A pet can be a soul mate. A pet can help you learn patience that you would not other wise learn with a human. I struggle more with humans than animals most of the time. Think about it. What cat owner doesn’t mind picking up cat poo or changing litter or cleaning it up from around the cat box? Or a dog owner who walks the neighborhood with a bag of freshly collected poo in a tidy little plastic bag. That’s some serious patience and commitment and I surely would not do that for another human. Perhaps you recently broke up with the love of your life; a pet can bring great comfort and sometimes just seem to wander into your life unexpectedly to help in your healing process. They could very well be one of your soul mates.

Finding a soul mate. Just like love, your soul mates will come when you are not searching; whether it is a soul mate for romantic purposes or not. In the mean time, there is time for self-reflecting, self-improvement, and general focus on achieving your own dreams. If you are continuously engaged with other humans, it may be that you are using them for a distraction from yourself. You are cheating yourself out of getting to know who you are and what you want. As humans grow and pass through the standard human growth stages, we want different things in life at different times. When you were ten years old, you may have wanted to be a ballerina or an astronaut. In your teens, maybe you wanted to be a basketball star or a rock star. It is normal for your aspirations to change during young adulthood to middle adulthood, etc. The key is to continue to move forward, work towards your dreams, and learn about yourself and your place in this world. It is quite fortuitous when a soul mate walks into your life especially if you are aware that they are in fact a soul mate. Having the opportunity to engage with just yourself in between the meetings of soul mates is amazing.

Final thoughts. Soul mates are real and are important in your life but you need not look for them. They will come when you need them to learn the next life lesson or fulfill some life purpose. They may or may not be a romantic soul mate. Soul mates do not come into your life to complete you but they can certainly compliment your life. Get to know yourself, pay attention, and enjoy your life every moment.

Cheers,

Robbie Lee, author of The Straight Man’s Pocket Guide To Picking Up a Hottie-Written by a Woman Who Loves Women.

Check out my web at Robbie411.com.

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