One of the most uncomfortable things for men to think about when it comes to women and dating is when to make the first move. It can drive you nuts! You don’t want to seem too forceful, but you also don’t want to seem too passive. Your whole early dating experiences with a particular woman end up revolving around this 3 second moment when you try and lean in for a kiss.

I am going to tell you what you probably don’t want to hear. When you are on a first date, or even a second date, don’t even consider making a move. Try not to even think about it. I know, a lot of guys have a hard time not thinking about hooking up, but it will make things a hell of lot easier, and more exciting when the time finally comes to heat things up a bit.

Why do I tell you this? It’s simple really. SEXUAL TENSION. Sexual tension is your best friend in the early stages of dating. It is such a powerful energy, and when the time is right, it bursts with uncontrollable passion.

I have waited up to 4 dates before making a move. Now, I am not saying to wait that long each time, but you need to feel out and understand each dating experience separately. As you date more women, you will get better at figuring out just the right time to make the first move.

There are many reasons why taking it a bit slow, and not trying to jump her bones immediately is a good thing. Of course, taking it slowly builds sexual tension, but lets look into it a bit further.

Not trying to hook up with a girl right away shows that you are not a needy person. And, if you have read some of my previous articles, you know that this is a big turn-on to women. It shows that you are confident and in control of your universe.

It also will get her thinking. Does he find me attractive? Does he just want to be friends? Why hasn’t he made a move yet? Every other guy I have dated has tried to make a move the first night I met him. Is there something wrong with me?

Getting her to question things will not only give you a bit of an edge, but it will make her that much more determined to get you to like her and hook up with her. Now, I don’t want you to think that I am suggesting that you play mind games with her. That is not what this is. This is simply using some basic techniques in human interaction that can yield great results for you. You don’t have to act like a jerk in the process.

So, for now, don’t worry about hooking up with her. Just build up the sexual tension and be yourself. How do you build up this sexual tension? Stay tuned for that. I will be back in a few days with some really amazing pointers!

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On our About the Expert page, you can learn more about the author, including contact information and other posts they've written. About Jack Rockwell.