Time and time again people come into my office telling me their relationship is great except for problems with communication. (Really? I think to myself). Then I go out to dinner with friends and they tell me the same thing. (Certainly I have stumbled upon a pattern). If everybody is talking about a lack of communication in their relationship, why isn’t anybody doing anything about it?
Communication is a key ingredient for romance and a prerequisite for happiness in your relationship. If you aren’t happy in your relationship, you certainly will not have any romance. You don’t need a relationship expert with a zillion degrees and decades of experience to tell you this. It is plain old common sense – happiness and romance go hand-in-hand. The problem however, is you can’t have romance or happiness without communication. I am not talking about any kind of communication. It must be effective communication.
Effective communication is not just an exchange of words between two people. Couples cannot possibly get through the week without an exchange of words. Effective communication takes place when two people give each other their undivided attention; it requires the ability to be “present” for each other. This means you are not multi-tasking when you and your partner are having a conversation. Effective communication also requires active listening. No matter what words are being spoken, if your partner is not listening you are not communicating effectively. Effective communication prevents misunderstandings that may lead to fights that usually play out something like this: “You never told me that”! “Oh yes I did. You obviously weren’t listening to me, again”. What couple can’t relate to this type of heated exchange?
I cannot overemphasize enough the importance of effective communication and how it is the linchpin for increase intimacy, romance and happiness in your relationship. A great resource for relationship advice is my free ezine titled: “Two Hearts Beating As One” found @www.relationshiptoolbox.com. Check it out.
Building Together a Relationship Filled With Love, Health & Wealth,
Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
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