By Keith Makenas

First off, I’m going to write a disclaimer:  I’m not trying to be negative here, I’m just trying to prepare you for what will happen in the near future.  The following is an example of what happens after you’ve been in a relationship for quite some time.

Month One: “OMG, he’s as classy as James bond, dances like Fred Astaire, and is as laid back as a cuddly Koala Bear on Quaaludes.”

“Dude! This chick is insanely awesome, she’s not like other girls, she brings me rum and cokes with ninety percent rum, she doesn’t mind my smoking and she said she wants to please me in the sack and do whatever I want, including bringing other girls into the bedroom!”

After a Year: “Yeah he’s changed, he doesn’t take me dancing he just sits around his apartment watching B rated horror films in sweat pants with a huge hole in the crotch so he can scratch himself.”

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Romantic relationships are a partnership of two people who have decided to share in the joys and sorrows of a committed life together. Married couples take the vows: “For better or worse, for richer or poorer” – Stop right there. People say vows similar to the ones just written but do we really mean them? – especially the part about “for richer or poorer”? Even though we say these words – if we are totally honest with ourselves we really mean: “but I hope it’s for richer”. Common sense dictates no one in their right mind wants to be poor. I mean honestly, get real.

Following are 7 simple ways or guidelines for handling money issues throughout your relationship so you don’t have to end up fighting about money. Consider these guidelines to be your relationship tools for keeping the spark alive in your relationship whether you are dealing with the “richer” or “poorer” times in your relationship.

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First dates, first kiss, first times…are so essential to how we form our ideas for love. But what does love have to do with it? Today, everyone has their own perception of what love should be. Some of the most common reasons are for romance, solid relationship, compatibility, future, financial stability, kids, etc…While some of might settle for a lesser version of the dream, it is our own unique vision that keeps us out there searching for love.

I have come across women, who have actual lists of things someone must have before they will even date?

Here is a short list of examples:

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Would you marry you? If you were/are single, are you the kind of person you’d be looking for and want to hook up with?

Sure, we all want a partner who is our version of the Perfect 10. But truth be told, we cross our fingers that said Perfect 10 will settle for a Strong 7 and overlook a few of our less than perfect traits. When you’re dating and doing your best to impress the object of your affection, you’ve got a couple of things working for you: (1) your sweetheart is blinded by falling-in-love hormones, and (2) you’re on your best behavior. You’ll never seem more like a Perfect 10 than in those too-short falling-in-love days.

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Doesn’t it drive you absolutely crazy when someone wears sunglasses indoors? I know I don’t like it at all. I can’t help but think: “What are you trying to hide?” When someone does not allow me to see their eyes I always feel a little queasy when I look at them. This queasiness is magnified a thousand times if I am trying to have a conversation with someone who is wearing sunglasses. All my uncomfortable feelings about someone wearing sunglasses is squarely based on the fact that I cannot see their eyes. This inability to see someone’s eyes and not be able to make eye contact with them when having a conversation leaves one with the same feeling: “What are you hiding from me?’ or “what don’t you want me to know?”

It cannot be emphasized enough the value of making direct eye contact when communicating with our partner.

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If you lack confidence when it comes to making conversation on a first date, relax because everything you need to know is right here. Making conversation is simple.

The main reason that men end up feeling that they blew their first date is because they forgot they were talking to a woman.  Girls expect to be the center of your attention so when you go off for an hour on a personal subject they get turned off quickly.

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Break ups are hard but after time passes, you can find out that they are rewarding. I often find myself disgusted with things I enjoyed with my ex, like certain movies, televisions shows andetc. The reason why, is that I was becoming what he wanted me to be and still didn’t get the ring. So now I am in an exclusive relationship with MYSELF! What I mean by this is I take ever step that I would do in a relationship but for myself only.

Step 1: Look the part- When I get up in the morning I want to make sure I look good. As I step outside my goal is to make heads turn. I love to see men get wide eye and do the Charlie Chaplin with their eye brows as they see me walk by. I don’t respond to the attention physically because I know it takes more to get my time. Ever notice people who are in good relationships are quick to tell others that try to pursue them, that is what not responding to others attention being single is doing for me. Being confident gets you attention that you deserve!

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Okay, I’m going to be honest. This is not an entirely original idea. It was inspired by Brenda and Gill, the most clever couple I’ve ever met when it comes to keeping things playful and spicy. For example, they’re fond of having candlelit black tie dinners for two and they each wear nothing but a black tie. They might spend Saturday night in a fiercely fought game of strip poker or bikini Twister. Yep, they like to to get naked which, as you might imagine, leads to the boudoir, which leads me to the point of this article.

In today’s economy, we all need to save and most of us have less do-re-mi to spend on a night on the town, let alone a weekend getaway. As a result, a couple’s date night too often involves a remote control and, before you know it, you’re in that rut you said you’d never fall into. So, try this on for size . . .

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Fighting – or conflict if we want to get a little fancy with our words here – is a normal – even healthy part of any intimate relationship. You know this is true. Unless you are a “Stepford Wife” or “Stepford Girlfriend”; do you remember this movie? The one where the wives were killed and replaced with robots who were programmed to look and act like the perfect wife? Ugh, gross – I am cringing. Anyway, since you are not a Stepford Wife (thank goodness) – you and your partner are not going to feel and think the same way about every issue and/or situation that comes along. In other words, you and your partner – both having a mind of your own, are bound to disagree and hence, fight at times.

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The title is not a question, it’s a statement.  What? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? ARE YOU DEAF???  Sound familiar? It’s amazing how much power one word has.  Sometimes people say words to their partner that they later regret, like hate, idiot, psycho, the list goes on and on, but the word that gets the most reaction is “what”.  Why, because those other words aren’t as bad as you think. “I hate you”, I hate you too. “You’re an idiot” the feeling is mutual. “You’re psycho”, you’re right.  Alright I admit those are horrendous words to say, but I’m just trying to justify why saying “what” is so bad.

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