Jarrod Asked:
“After two months of dating, my girlfriend complained that I never told her that I loved her. To me, two months isn’t too soon to say that, but it does seem a bit early to worry that nobody has said it. But that’s not my problem. I had planned to surprise her with a trip to Houston to see a museum she’d mentioned that she always wanted to visit, way back when we started dating, with reservations at her favorite restaurant there, where I’d let her know how much she meant to me. But now, she’s pretty much said that if I do tell her I love her, she would wonder whether it was because she complained. The timing is frustrating, and I am even a bit (maybe unreasonably) mad at her for preemptively sabotaging a gesture that I wanted to mean something to both of us. I want to save this relationship, but I don’t know what I can do at this point to make her believe my sincerity.” - Jarrod (32, Sugarland, Texas)
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Jarrod,
Man I feel you pain my friend. If I were you I’d think about just sitting her down and tell her you will explain everything in a few days but that if she loves you shes going to have to trust you. Then have the dinner and let it play out. But you need to be ready to be honest and let her know you are just trying to take it slow and get to know one another before just saying I love you because someone needs or wants to hear it. Let her know you were just trying to do a man of honor and not just hollow words. You were right two months is not enough time to really get to know a person. And when it comes to love, it has to be after you decide what it is that you love about her and is it something to build on. That being said I will tell you as I would anyone you are still young and before jumping into a relationship with anyone, I would make sure I had everything else in my life in order. I would make sure I had all my schooling done and a place that was mine that I could afforde and that you were starting a career, after that everything else will fall into place. Remember the road to a great relationship is “Always show comfort without judgment… compassion without expectation… and love without measure” However it goes, good luck and Gods speed my friend.
finding-your-true-north@live.com
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