Dashra,
I understand your pain, honestly I do. But first let’s just put this out there, joining the army is not the answer nor something you do to be near someone, especialy when it’s a move that can cost you your life. The Army is a something you do out of pride and honor. A since of fighting for your country and for freedom and staning for those to young to old or to sick to do so. Ok sorry let me get off my soap box on that. As far as him not trusting you, you were very vauge so I figure there are about two options. One; He is telling you this because he is joining and dont want to see you hurt and dont know how to talk to you about it. (And just because someone is serving in the military does not mean they are chasing every woman they come across looking for sex) or two; you have said or did something without realizing it or he heard something either way your best bet is to let him go tell him you love him and will be there for him as a friend then start living your life. take this time to find yourself and figure out who you are and what you want from life. Learn to stand on your own, start working on your education and start thinking about your career. Hope things began to look up for you and remember the key to any relationship is communication. Good luck and Gods speed
C.J

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Did he say WHY he cannot trust you? Why all of a SUDDEN? I’m not buying it. In fact, I’ll go out on a limb and say he’s full of it. (I’m rarely wrong about these things, IF EVER. So don’t go believing everything he says. It will only HURT you in the end.)

Men in the military have TONS of women all over them. And, they are NOT IMMUNE to it. In fact, they LOVE the attention. Maybe your ex just doesn’t wanna CHEAT on you, so he broke up with you ahead of time.

Furthermore, you should NOT join the military in an attempt to PROVE something to him. If he doesn’t want to be with you, joining the military will NOT CHANGE that. He probably wants his freedom. The “I don’t trust you” speech was merely a cop out.

TRUST me. You asked us for advice, so TAKE it. We’re all telling you similar things, so we can’t all be wrong. The boyfriend has his OWN happiness in mind. So, instead of basing YOUR happiness AROUND HIS (or around him in GENERAL) why not try to find a life OUTSIDE of this guy? His life consisted of more than just you. So, I think you should do the same.

If you need more assistance, or have more detail to provide, email me:
JayTheAdviceMan@aol.com

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Dear Dashara,

The one part of your question that is easy to answer is this: Do NOT join the military just to prove yourself to this man. The rest of your question is difficult to answer because you haven’t given many details. Does he have reason not to trust you? If so, then you rebuild trust by being trustworthy over an extended period of time. Trust isn’t rebuilt with one unrelated action such as joining the army. If he has no reason to distrust you, then perhaps the issue is his and, about that, you can do nothing.

Bottom line is that we need more information to truly help you.

Best,
Shela Dean
http://www.ShelaDean.com
http://www.FrequentForeplayMiles.com

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The question is, has he explained why he does not trust you. Is it legitimate, you did not say. We really need more information to help you.

Blessings on you and yours
John Wilder

marriagecoach1@yahoo.com

marriagecoach1.wordpress.com blog

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