Expert advice to get your relationships back on track
2010
Luke Asked:“i been with my girlfriend for 3 and half years. i keep accusing my girlfrined of cheating and meeting up with other lads. i read a comment on her facebook saying that she loves him while we were still together and i confronted her about it and she denies it saying that she loves me which i dont believe.”
- Luke (20)
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Luke,
Sometimes the truth hurts. If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, has webbed feet and a beak, it’s not a cow. Out of the abundance of the heart, or in this case, the keyboard, the mouth speaks. If you give a person enough time, whatever is in their heart will come out of their mouth. It’s time to be wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove.
There’re lots of women that will not treat you that way. Don’t settle!!! She is taking advantage of your feelings and what appears to be low self worth. You can do much better. People will treat you how you allow them to. Anyone that can look you in the face while lying to you DOES NOT LOVE YOU!!! It’s better to be alone and happy as opposed to living a lie in a one sided relationship. As long as you remain in this dysfunctional affair you’re making four people miserable; you and the person you’re with, not to mention the two people you’re destined to meet.
I suggest you visit my website at http://www.divanyoung.com. Order, “Break Up, Don’t Break Down” by Relationship Expert, D Ivan Young. It will help you to discover your divine purpose as you position yourself for real authentic love to find you. Luke, you deserve to be happy, loved and secure. Without trust, there is no relationship. You will only continue to be taken advantage of unless you make your mind up to get out of this. There are lot’s of good decent women out there that will not treat you this way. If you’re going to meet the right woman, you must let go of the wrong one. The sooner this comes to an end, the better. Stop blocking your blessing. Make room for real love to come your way. You deserve to be loved. Don’t you?
By Relationship Expert, D Ivan Young
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Luke,
Have you ever heard of, innocent until proven guilty? Love is blind but not stupid. If you don’t have any concrete proof, stop accusing her, it’ll only weigh on your relationship. However…beware Luke, sometimes when you go digging into holes, you find things that disturb you. So prepare your heart for the worst. On the flip side of this though….the only way to make a man trustworthy, is to trust him. Hope this helps, God bless.
Cinique’
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Dear Luke,
You have not asked a question.
If you like being distrusting, if being accusatory appeals to you, then by all means, continue. On the other hand, mature adult relationships require a certain amount of faith and trust.
You should grow up.
Sincerely,
Suzanne White Montiel
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Were you accusing her of cheating even BEFORE you saw that comment? My guess is YES. Which means you have some TRUST issues. No matter WHO your girlfriend was, you’d be accusing her of cheating on you. That’s a problem, as it can drive your girlfriend away.
The Facebook comment COULD have been innocent. I don’t know, because I didn’t see it. Now, did she just deny LOVING that other guy, or did she deny even leaving the COMMENT?
If she denied LOVING him, she probably meant that she doesn’t love him “IN THAT WAY.” Now, if she denied even leaving the COMMENT, and you SAW the comment, then she’s obviously a LIAR, and should be dumped immediately. But all this arguing is stupid.
Either stay with her, and stop fighting, or break up with her if you don’t trust her. Those are your only healthy options. Period.
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Dear Luke,
Trust is the fundamental basis upon which all relationships are based. If you don’t trust your girlfriend and are not satisfied by her answers when you question her, then you need to consider whether you’re in the right relationship.
Shela Dean
Relationship Coach, Speaker & Bestselling Author
http://www.ShelaDean.com
http://www.FrequentForeplayMiles.com
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Luke it is hard to answer you. You have not asked a question. You don’t say if you live with your girlfriend. What is it that you want from us? It is possible to love a guy as a friend. If she is so untrustworthy why are you still with her?
Blessings on you and yours
John Wilder
marriagecoach1.wordpress.com blog
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Kypris Aster Drake, M.S., M.A.
Specialty: Sex, Book Author
Location: CA, U.S
Posts by Kypris Aster Drake, M.S., M.A.
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i am really confused on what to do. I been with this girl
for 9 months and 2 weeks. We moved in together when we were
together for 4 months. I started realizing she kept guys on the
side, in that time she wasn’t sure if we were serious. Before we
moved in together I cheated once on her, and one day when i broke
up with her she got drunk at a party and got with some guy she
knew. Once we moved in me and her had a big fight which i was doing
whatever to have her back, she brought a guy with her to pick up
her stuff, which later i convince her not to leave. later i caught
them both having sex in our room. then once i caught them they
left, then the next day she came back saying she made a mistake and
doesn’t want to lose me and i took her back which im hoping it
wasn’t a mistake. Ever since its been hard to trust her. To this
day we had money trouble and moved into her parents house. And she
is telling me she wants to be serious and wants to have kids and
get married. I am worried because honestly i cant trust her, maybe
its me…. she hid her myspace after she told me she was going to
erase hers which i always see guys trying to hit on her, she says
she wants to keep it because of all her friends. I asked her if she
really wants to be serrious if not leave me and she tells me she
wants to be with me, but i just dont trust her how do i trust her?
i do love her, but what do i do do i leave her or be with
her?
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