Kevin Asked:
“How Do I Know if this girl really likes me?
So, I met this girl Thursday night, but prior she was in one of my college classes. I never had the nerves to actually go up to her and talk, but a couple of my friends and I went out that thursday (she came out with us) and I talked to her and asked her how her class went, whats her plans and etc, but at that time it was really loud at the bar so I said, i’ll talk to you later outside. When we started to go to new dance club/bar
when we got into the bar, i bought her and her friend a drink, but when we got to the dance floor, she pretty much isolated herself to the corner of the room. My friends and I went off for abit, 5 minutes later I noticed at the corner of my eye she was still sitting around. I then approached her and started to talk and tried to get her to dance with us. She kept on telling me she doesn’t know how to dance and I assured her that most of the people in the dance club don’t either(this took about 30-45 minutes). I then went on and bought her another drink to loosen her up. After a while of convincing, She finally walked down to the dance floor with me and her friend was pretty much alone. I felt bad so i had to convince her friend to. When i finally got both of them to the dance floor, i was showing them small and basic popping moves. I think she liked it because the whole time she was smiling and a little embarrassed. After a while, I asked her for her phone number, which i got. When a slow music came on, i asked her if she knew how to slow dance, and we held hands and slow danced, but throughout the night she kept on telling me she was sleepy, i wanted to tell her should head home, but i didn’t. (she also drove seperate). Oh and this might be corny but, i told her she needs to come out more often and we pinky promised on it.
For some reason I feel that she just felt obligated to dance with me and didn’t really want to dance with me at all, but then i’m not that confident myself. (I’m not the greatest looking guy on earth, i’ve seen far better looking guys).
Then the next morning i sent her a text saying
“Hey, I hope you guys got home safe and it was fun meeting you. You should come with us to lunch sometime”
And that point i never got a reply.
And then the next day i texted her saying, that she should go out to again with us sometime. No reply either.
So i’m thinking, is she just ignoring me? Does she even like me?
What should I do next?
I haven’t called her or anything yet, which I should, but I’ve been texting her… whats the difference between texting and calling anyways? It’s both communication, thats how I see it at least.
Well what should I do now?!
I want to get this girl out again, but I have only three weeks before she goes on summer break and I won’t see her again!!! (Until next semester at least)”
- Kevin (21, Columbia, SC, USA)
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Dear Kevin,
Her lack of communication, while not a sure sign, certainly points to her disinterest in you. Sure, it could be that she’s busy and hasn’t had time to get back to you. Or it could be that she’s shy and doesn’t know what to say to you. Or it could be that she has no interest in you. It could be all three.
Either way, the ball is in her court and she is not returning it. Lobbing more balls over the net is likely to just annoy her so it’s probably best to back off. If you have to wait until next semester so be it.
A phone call and a text differ in that the phone call is more difficult to ignore, and so might be seen – considering you’ve already texted her several times without a response – as pushy on your part.
Sincerely,
Suzanne White Montiel
SF Sex and Relationships Examiner
http://www.examiner.com/x-14163-SF-Sex-and-Relationships-Examiner
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