Expert advice to get your relationships back on track
2009
Connie Asked:“why sometimes guys use these stupid reason to break Up? Such as; tired of yell his g/f for these stupid things as he makes thing big deal.
After broke up just a week, he starts dating with someone else. I don’t know that he knows her before when me and him together or met her. For me it seemed like a rebound.”
- Connie (30, CA, U.S)
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Hi Connie
It sounds like to me that thia guy was way ahead of you in the breaking-up dept! Why do guys do the things they do is a debate that has gone on for centuries! Sometimes they are no explanations…it just what it is? If I were I be happy he moved on especially since it sounds like he was not treating you well?
In reality I think that whether you area man or woman, break-ups can be hard especially if you don’t want to face another failed relationship? It sometimes easier to get a new bf or gf as soon as possible? Often times it turns out to be a rebound and other times it can turn out to be something even better?
Say bye bye to a guy that you are obviously better off without! There are alot of good men out there…don’t waste your time with the wannabes!
Good Luck
Gina Landeau
Hello Ms Heartbreak, I’ve been expecting you!
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The answer to this is simple. And you ALMOST answered it YOURSELF.
Many times, if an individual is getting sick and tired of the drama they go through with their partner, they start to look ELSEWHERE. Almost, putting themselves “back on the MARKET”, so to speak.
Then, when they FIND someone else, they wait until the NEXT time you two fight, and BREAK UP with you, citing the fact that you two “ARGUE too much” as their reason.
And, since it makes sense, and part of it is TRUE, they figure they can USE it. It’s pretty basic stuff.
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You’ve made the common mistake that there is an unspoken agreement between you and him that says that he will accept you if you will accept him… but in fact, as I’m sure you’ll find if you look through any paper work you possess, there is no such agreement.
Even though you already know this… you are still operating your day to day life as if you had such an agreement. As long as you continue to do so you will very often be blindsided by men losing their interest.
What are some things you can do to prevent this from happening?
1. Smile – you smiling should have nothing to do with him or your life. You create your situation and in so doing you determine how you will react to it. Change whatever it is to a smile.
2. Touch – touching is unconscious but if you do it more often and most importantly without the expectation of being thanked or touched back… it will lead to more intimacy. You don’t need a reason to touch. Just walk by and do it. Just for a second but make it much more often. Many men think they are receiving “signals” telling them you are no longer interested in them… this touch helps them along.
3. Act Helpless from time to time – Guys love to “be that guy” that fixes stuff and takes care of things. But if it’s a list or something of the like then they just think they are being ordered around. But if they think they are doing some rescuing well… different results.
Your value to him is always what it is in this moment. What’s gone before is not part of the equation. As long as you continue to add value from the past you will get inaccurate results. You have to figure out your value by things as they are RIGHT NOW. If you don’t like the answer, it looks like you have some work to do.
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