Jennie Asked:

“Basically, I think my boyfriend is being really pissy over something I didn’t think was a big deal. We were talking the other day about sports we no longer take part in but used to enjoy and I mentioned that I used to do judo in college and was pretty good, even though I only received a beginner’s yellow belt.

He thought this was hilarious because I’m tall and blond and weigh around 125lbs, and I guess he didn’t think that a pretty girl could fight her way out of a paper bag, much less do a martial art.

So when he got done laughing at me (he really was laughing) I challenged him to a wrestling match. Long story short, I used some timely leg sweeps and wrist throws to send him to the floor a few times, and after a while he got so tired out that his strength advantage was gone, and I was able to pin him.

Well, I figured he would have learned his lesson, but he’s totally bent out of shape about it…he’s been pouty and obnoxious ever since the match and keeps challenging me to a rematch, saying I got lucky, and that he wasn’t trying hard…all this stuff to protect his macho ego.

So what do I do? Give him a rematch and let him win? (He would totally rub it in my face and say things like “I told you women can’t fight”). Or agree to a rematch and try my best again, risking another blow to his ego if he loses? Or just refuse and tell him to deal with it? (I’ve tried that last option and he just won’t let it go).

Lucia–have YOU ever beaten a guy at something physical and had him react this way?
Please advise!”

- Jennie

Our Expert Responded:
 
Bad idea to wrestle and win with your boyfriend.  Men need to feel manly and strong.  You made him feel like a pussy and now he wants a rematch in order to prove he isn’t one.  There’s no easy solution to this.  Whatever choice you make, it sounds like you’ll never hear the end of it.  I can’t tell you what to do in this case.  You’re going to have to follow your heart.
 
In the future, remember guys want to be with women because they are the opposite of them, meaning, they (the women) are not men.  Stop wrestling guys.  So what if you can beat them?  In the end, they will not be more attracted to you, so you will be the one who is losing.
 
- Lucia

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